[Editor’s note: Giaimo comes into this week’s picks with a record of 7-2. Not too shabby.]
1) 2 Skeezy Brothers & A Broadskee (-25) over Bitterskeet: I remember the
brothers from last season. They were slow starters then and they have
gotten off to a slower start this year. But week 2 was a big improvement
for the team and I expect that trend to continue. Bitterskeet has been
fairly consistent in their mediocre (read: awful) play so far. Jen can’t
carry the team all by herself. I like the Brothers and the Broad to win
handily. Hopefully Amber can tell them apart better than I can.
2) Skeefendants (-20) over Skee Love: I think Vegas made the spread this
low so that I’d have something smart to say about how bad our team is going
to destroy Skee Love. Best case scenario for them is probably 840 on any
given night. If Sunil goes 300 then I think Kelly and Liz could average 27
between the two of them (and that’s optimistic). That’s about 60 points
lower then what the Skeefendants will be averaging going forward. Brian
may be trying to create a rivalry between Liz and I but it’s not a rivalry
when the other team doesn’t have a chance to win. This is not the Yankees
v. Red Sox. It’s the Yankees v. an Amish little league team.
[Editor’s note: This is going to be a great match to watch. Will Liz be able to sneak into “The One’s” head and throw his game off? Also, I love the Amish.]
3) Dynaskee (-140) over Rollin Deep: I hate taking the favorite on matches
with such big spreads but Rollin Deep isn’t giving me much of a choice.
Leslie is their team leader and she’s averaging a 21. Anand has been
playing on and off for about 3 years and he’s averaging less than 20.
Dynaskee isn’t that great but Ashley is good enough by herself to account
for at least 100 points of the 140 spread. Can her teammates cover the
rest? I’m guessing YES. Assuming she shows up and Rollin Deep doesn’t
improve their team by subbing in a functional monkey, I think Dynaskee can
win by 200.
4) Skeeve McQueen (-70) over Funkskee: I didn’t want to include McQueen in
my picks this week because I feel like the whole league is fellating this
team on a weekly basis, but this spread is so ridiculous that I’d be
irresponsible if I didn’t yell at Vegas for it. The averages on
these two teams are 200 points apart but the spread is 70? Did Heather
revert to her form circa 2006? Does Vegas know about a ringer sub this
week? It really doesn’t matter. I don’t think Skeeve is going to break
900 this week and I still guarantee they win by at least 120.
[Editor’s note: Perhaps Vegas does have some insider info on this match…]
5) 3 MSkees (-15) over Sesame Skeet: I hate that I picked all favorites
this week but I really didn’t have a choice. I’ve heard Brian say “don’t
sleep on Sesame Skeet” about 15 times this skeeson. After scores of 742 and
780, I’m hoping he changes his tune. 3 MSkees got rolled last week because
the Skeefendants intimidated them, they were forced to shoot for some
hundos, and Dom took a while to get back in the flow from a long hiatus.
They’ll figure it out this week and win by about 80 points.
[Editor’s note: Sesame Skeet rolls incredibly better after a few cocktails, so look for them to break 800 in their first 9:00 match this skeeson and give 3MSkees a run for their money. Plus, Sesame Skeet has sweet uniforms.]